What a blessing children are from the Lord!Psalm 127:3, "Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward."God is good and can always be trusted. We have so many wonderful memories through the years. By God's grace, both Heather and I (Dan) were protected from many of the things of the world in our childhood. Although I wasn't raised in a Christian home, my parents were Catholic and sent us children off to church each week. I stayed out of trouble, as the world would define it. For a number of my childhood years, my parents owned a bar. Our house was connected to the bar, and I was one door away from all the drinking and drunkenness that took place. God graciously used this to keep me from ever desiring to pursue alcohol as a part of my adult life. I am so thankful. Heather grew up quite the opposite. Her family never missed a church service, and her parents were Baptist. She had never been around the drinking and smoking environment that I grew up around.
We met during our time at Bob Jones University. We had both made professions of faith at the time and were persuaded that we were Christians. We both looked good on the outside. Based on the teaching in church and Bible college, we had no reason to question our profession of faith. We met during Heather's senior year. Her plans were to attend the University of Kansas Medical School where she had already been accepted. I was studying Bible and planning to become a pastor. In the Lord's perfect plan, and with the full blessing of her parents, Heather decided to pursue marriage over medicine. She has said many times that she does not regret that decision. We married in 1988. In 1991, I finished my Bible degree. We went back to Arizona, and I became an assistant pastor. God was working in my heart during this time in ways I didn't even understand. I began to see that salvation was not simply "accepting Jesus". Salvation was through faith in Christ that resulted in pursuing Christ with the whole life. After a year and a half in Arizona, I was offered the position of pastor in Gilman, WI. This was same church I professed faith in 13 years earlier. Our son, Daniel, was born in late 1991. In August of 1992, we moved across the country, and I began pastoring the Gilman Baptist Church. With my Bible degree and all that I learned, I was ready to lead the church and preach Christ. As I was about to quickly learn, I really didn't know my Bible, and I would also soon find out that I didn't even know Christ.
The church was small, around 35 people when we arrived. Within a few months, we were doubled in size on a Sunday morning. Things seemed to be going great. As the pastor of the church, married to a wonderful woman, and with a new baby, I thought I was on top of things....until God met me in His Word that night in December of 1992. I was studying the Scripture for my Sunday messages and the verse seemed to hit me hard.John 8:32, "and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” It was as if the Spirit of God took the Word of God and cut me to the heart. I knew I was not free! I knew that I was enslaved to a heart sin that I couldn't overcome. Having been taught the "carnal christian" teaching in church and school, I thought I just needed to try harder and rededicate myself to Christ. I remember crying out to God on my office floor. I needed to know the truth, and I didn't care what the cost was, even if that meant that men would oppose me. I remember rising from the floor and being convicted that I needed to go and apologize to my wife. God was gracious, and she was forgiving. I didn't know it at the time, but that was my conversion to Christ.
Not being sure of what had taken place in my life that night, I continued preaching. A few months later, Heather was convicted and realized that she had never truly been born again. By God's grace, we were "new creations". I mention this in part to say that God gave us a Christian home from that time on. We learned quickly that when you stand for the truth, you will be opposed. I began preaching that salvation was more than just a profession, and there must be fruit as evidence of one's faith. This lined up with the book of James. What was now clear to me was that salvation was not simply salvation from hell, but salvation from sin. Jesus came to save his people from their sin (Matthew 1:21). Salvation was by the grace of God, through faith, and not of works. But true faith always produces works! God calls these works "good" in Ephesians 2:10. At this point, things started to get tough. Some people didn't like my message fromJames 2:20, "But wilt thou know, O vain man, that faith without works is dead?"I called for a meeting of the church and offered to step down. The church took a vote, and I was unanimously asked to stay as pastor. It wasn't long though, and the opposition to the truth began to grow. God was teaching us to stand, regardless of the cost. I eventually realized I was a new believer and stepped down as pastor.
Over the next number of years our family began to grow. By God's grace, we were already having regular family devotions and teaching our children the Gospel. We had a wonderful home life, and we had much joy and peace in our home. We began homeschooling, and Heather devoted her days to providing a solid education to the children. I was working a regular job, and we enjoyed family life together. Again, by God's grace, we taught our children the Gospel. As they grew, they began to see their need of Christ. I had the privilege of baptizing all but one of my children upon their profession of faith (the other child being baptized by our pastor at that time). Our home was marked by the Word of God, church life, family activities, and much love. We ate meals together, and thankfully we never got involved in activities that drew our family apart.
I pastored various churches through the years and loved to mentor men one-on-one. Over time this lead to a jail/prison ministry in which we bought a home to provide a 6-month program for men released from prison. It was a challenging ministry, but God was gracious. Many of the men ended up back in prison, but I still remain in touch with some. They call me because they know I love them. Our first resident has pressed on with the Lord. I was privileged to be the best man in his wedding a couple years ago.
A major event in our lives was in 2013. My mother had passed away in 2011. My father came to visit with us for a month in August of 2013. Although he had never been open to hearing about the Gospel, the Lord did a mighty work in his heart. While at our house, he picked up a book from my bookshelf entitledHeaven and Hell. He read in the book some during the day. When I arrived home in the afternoon, he asked if we could talk. Of course, I was happy to talk. He explained that he realized he deserved to go to hell. I was amazed! After all these years, my 83 year old father wanted to talk about the Gospel. I spent the next two weeks sharing Christ with him. After those two weeks, he professed his faith in Christ. I was blessed to baptize him in the lake near our house. He ended up living with us a month later and spent 8+ years in our home before he passed away in 2021, three days short of his 91st birthday. In addition, we had the privilege of caring for Heather's cousin, Donna, who lived near us for the last 3 years of her life. We are so thankful we could model to our children the honor due to our parents and even to the elderly by caring for these two dearly loved individuals. May the Lord use our example in our children's lives.
Our children continued to grow, and we were thankful that they enjoyed our home life. We never wanted our children to move out when they were 18. Rather, we wanted them to know they were welcome to stay at home until the Lord led them on their own. Daniel stayed in our home until he was 23-1/2 years old, Amy stayed until she was 25, Bethany was 22 when she got married, Carissa was almost 23 when she moved out, and David was 19+ when he moved in with his sister and our son-in-law. By God's grace, the Lord allowed us to provide a good home where our children were treated with love and taught the Gospel. Yes, we had standards in our home, but our children were submissive and seemed to support our stand in regard to modesty, music, and friends. We only had a few issues with a couple of the children during their teenage years, but God seemed to bring them to see that their parents were loving and wanted their best.
We were heavily involved in church life, as well as Scriptoriums and the Bible Bee. In other words, our children were saturated with the Word of God, day in and day out. Thankfully, it never appeared that they did not desire the Word, but rather they appreciated it. It was a telling statement after Bethany got married and our son-n-law told us that we were the best parents he had ever met. He thanked us for raising Bethany as we did with such purity and love for the Lord. We still have two girls in the home, Ellia (16) and Faith (13). Both are sweet and joyful young ladies that love the Word of God and each other. We have such wonderful times together as a family of four in the home. As parents, we enjoy looking back at letters from the older children, even written as adults, telling us how wonderful our home was and how grateful they are for their parents. This can never be taken away! To have had the privilege to lead our children and see each of them make a profession of faith in Christ while in our home has always been a great blessing to us as parents. Of course, we understand that real conversion will endure, and only God knows the heart. We can only observe the fruit. May God answer our prayer for our entire family that on the Day of Judgment we will all hear, "Well done, good and faithful servant...enter into the joy of the Lord."
Below are some pictures of the family through the years. You will see the joy and unity that we had from these pictures. They provide us with such wonderful memories that can never be taken away! To God be the glory! Despite the trials of parenting, God has been gracious. We had to apologize many times to our children, and we readily did so. We taught that when apologies are offered and forgiveness is sought, it is our responsibility to respond with love and forgiveness. We taught our children to work hard to resolve conflicts. And we taught them that marriage is for life. By God's grace we have been married for 34+ years. Our greatest desire is still to be more like Christ and serve him faithfully until we are called home or Christ comes again.
